Two museums, two hours, and a MetroCard

While for many the onslaught of midterms means sleepless nights in Butler, for me it means the opportunity to find new and exciting ways not to study. This morning, for example, as I began writing a paper, I came up with an interesting procrastination option: visiting a museum. I also realized that going to one museum would in no way optimize my procrastination time—if I’m taking a break, I might as well try to get the most out of it.

I gave myself two hours—the perfect amount of time for a good break—and a MetroCard, for I was on a mission: how to visit two museums in under 120 minutes.

In planning my trip, I discovered that Museum Mile would be the one and only place I could go in order to meet all of my criteria successfully. In order to visit two museums in the specified amount of time, it clearly would be wisest to choose ones that are close to each other. For example, I would not want attempt to go to El Museo del Barrio at 104th Street and then the Metropolitan Museum of Art at 82nd Street because traveling 22 blocks would be impossible given my self-imposed time constraints.

Keeping this in mind, I have to take the 1 train down to 86th Street and then make a quick transfer to the crosstown bus. No matter what anyone says, the M4 is never faster. Trust me.

I also recognized that focusing on exhibitions, rather than museums, would be necessary. The best bet would be a small museum whose exhibitions tend to be very easy and quick to get through (not like the Guggenheim, which is essentially one gigantic exhibition), or a large museum with a variety of exhibition options from which to pick and choose.

Keeping all of this in mind, I came up with the perfect itinerary: the Neue Galerie and the Metropolitan Museum of Art. Not only are these two museums merely three blocks away from each other, but they always have several exhibitions going on at once.

Regardless of what is on view, the Neue’s permanent exhibition is my go-to option. German and Austrian favorites like Oskar Kokoschka and Egon Schiele never fail to put me in a cheery mood (I am especially partial to Schiele’s contorted, naked, and emaciated women). Gustav Klimt’s Adele Bloch-Bauer I brings a bit of controversy to my day—someone paid over $130 million for this particular painting. Plus, it only takes 30 minutes or so to peruse the collection.

The Met, on the other hand, is a much more difficult beast to tackle. I try to steer clear of the blockbuster temporary exhibitions (anything Picasso, Van Gogh, etc.) and the crowded wings (Egyptian, Greek, and Roman). Time is limited here, and there’s no way a sluggish tourist or a crying child is getting in my way.

“Hipsters, Hustlers, and Handball Players: Leon Levinstein’s New York Photographs, 1950-1980” is a good example of a small and intimate exhibit that requires very little time. Roughly 40 photographs of eclectic New Yorkers fill the room. Levinstein has an eye for the humorous—“Beach Scene: Woman Wearing Paper Bag Hat,” for example, features a smug older woman in her bathing suit, straps splayed out on her shoulders, wearing a paper bag on her head. I particularly enjoyed how Levenstein’s camera rarely focused directly on the subject. Rather, the shots are of people’s shoes, their clothing, the people in the background. It was nice to see the works of an artist whom I had never seen before.

While this exhibit will be closing soon, I always find that the Met has many other small ones to choose from. And, remember, just because a museum or exhibition is small doesn’t mean it’s bad. It only means you’ll be able to get a dose of culture and a much-needed mental break in a flash, before someone else beats you back to Butler and swipes your spot.