How to cheer for Columbia basketball

Welcome back, everyone. While I’m sure you’re all a little rusty from sleeping past noon all month and spending your days comatose in front of the TV, it’s time to get back into the swing of things. That means classes, homework, extracurriculars, and yes, sports.

While you were away catching up on four months of missed sleep, the basketball team has been hard at work. The guys have been out on the court, practicing, training, and facing off against all sorts of nonconference opponents all break long. But just this past weekend, the games really began—Ivy League competition has officially started.

While the Lions, unfortunately, weren’t able to pull off a win against either Penn or Princeton, both games were within four points and came down to the last minute. And even with the two losses, the Light Blue is still sporting a winning record of 11-7.

Now, I know this isn’t the most informed campus when it comes to sports—even the marquee ones—but that’s why we’re here. If you’ve read anything I’ve written in the past six months (humor me and pretend), then you know that I’m all about the football team. So understandably, basketball isn’t really my jam.

One of the great things about sports, though, is that as long as you love the atmosphere, you’ll find that any sport has the ability to capture your attention.

So, despite my fondness for the gridiron, I still enjoy hitting up a good Columbia basketball game. And to be honest, there’s really no reason not to. Levien Gym is crazy close—you could probably sprint there from most dorms without a coat on and regain full limb use in minutes. Plus, it’s entirely free. All you need is your CUID to get in, and it’s not like you ever walk around without that.

Finally, let’s be honest, it’s a completely justifiable way to avoid studying. Bringing school spirit to Columbia? You should get extra credit for that.

If you’re going to go to a game, though, you’ve got to know what to do. As someone who has had to pick up a couple pointers along the way, I’ve compiled a little introductory cheat sheet to help you fake it ’til you make it.

1)   Wear Columbia blue
It sounds simple, but you’d be surprised by how many people don’t show up in the proper attire. This is college basketball, ladies and gentlemen. We all go to this school. We all know what the school colors are. If, by some chance, you don’t already have a Columbia shirt lying around, the athletic department gives them away for free quite often at sporting events. All you have to do is go to one of those and you’re golden. Then you’ll be all set to join the sea of good old Columbia blue in Levien.

2)    Taunt without mercy
Now, heckling is a normal part of any sports competition. But with the less able members of the Ancient Eight coming to town, there’s some extra fun to be had. Columbia is, of course, the best of the Ivies. Therefore, it is your job as a fan to make sure that each and every other school that plays in Levien knows that they’re in our house. The best way to do this is to concisely point out their flaws. For example, a simple “safety school” chant will suffice for Brown. And it can never hurt to remind Cornell about its “state school” status. “Harvard rejects” should also strike a chord with Yale and Penn. Feel free to get creative, but these are some tried and true chants to get you started.

3)     Be loud (except for when you shouldn’t)
There’s such a thing in sports as home field advantage. Part of this advantage comes from loud, supportive fans. Levien is not that big, so it’s actually the perfect place to do lots of yelling and have a big effect. In reality, you can yell and scream and cheer whenever you want, but there are a few cardinal rules of basketball games that you should know. First, yell during other team’s free throws: taunt, jeer, distract, whatever. They’re trying to focus—make that as difficult as possible. On the flip side, though, be quiet during Columbia’s free throws. Again, they’re trying to focus—let them. “Air ball” should also be shouted whenever appropriate for the opposing team. If you don’t know basketball enough to get this one, just follow the crowd—someone else will be paying attention. Heckling the refs is also a good way to get some frustration out if things aren’t going so well. Coaches aren’t allowed to comment on officiating, so someone’s got to make sure those refs get a performance review from time to time.

So there it is, ladies and gentlemen—a few quick tips on looking like a seasoned veteran in the stands. I can’t force you to go, and if you’re going to be all hipster and whine about it, no one really wants you there anyway, but there’s a lot of heated conference competition coming up, and there’s no such thing as too many fans.

Victoria Jones is a Barnard College senior majoring in French
sports@columbiaspectator.com